Whine World No.2

THE No.2 reason we are here is because we do not have a unified voice.

 

In wine circles, this has been debated for decades. Rather than having an international or, at least national voice that promotes wine as a part of a healthy lifestyle that brings families and communities together we all, ever so politely, step on cadavers in hopes of becoming taller. Wineries all attempt to steal customers from each other by selling a better story. This is stupid on so many levels; the most important one is that this type of self-aggrandizing is aimed at those who are already wine drinkers rather than using marketing resources to welcome non-wine drinkers into our sphere.

Who is to blame for this?  Well, all of us, without exception. We are a collage of a million colors and shades and nuances. Among us there are salty farmers who’s handshake is stronger than titanium mixed with greedy nouveau-riche land-owners who bought a farm because their accountant told them they can reduce their taxable income. We are competent sales professionals wearing $2,400 Berluti shoes and second-generation immigrants and women who worked their ass off to create an opportunity for themselves in a Great White Male industry - and everything in between. We are a rainbow of non-conformists, nerdy science-geeks, corporate yes-sayers, passionate artists, ruthless snake-oil peddlers and so on.

 

According to a pretty famous old book, a guy named Noah was smart enough to take vine cuttings with him and preserve them (and millions of animals) from a cataclysmic event on this planet. The legend says that once the flood was over and a new deal was signed with the landlord (which oddly involved immediately sacrificing some of the animals saved from extinction). Noah planted a field of grapes and made wine and proceeded to indulge in extensive sampling of said wine. What a great story, what a significant tale. You’d think the wise men who chronicled the rebirth of the Human race would exalt water, or bread; maybe Vitamin C or Kombucha. But no, wine of all things, gets to forever be tied to our new covenant with our creator, whomever she might be.

You’d think the wine industry, as a whole, would jump on a story like that and find creative ways to warmly welcome people who were not lucky enough to grow up in a culture or a family where wine was a staple. We, in Sonoma and Napa, the Willamette Valey to name a few regions, are accustomed to folk who are already wine lovers. We forget that tens of millions of fellow Americans equate wine to just an expensive form of alcohol. No wonder they reach for a six-pack of beer or an RTD can instead of a bottle of wine they can’t open without a specialized tool and that goes by a name they can’t pronounce.

 

How about we stop boring good people with useless tidbits of important-sounding and often foreign words. How about we stop trying to sell them “bespoke” experiences that start at $500 per person. We need, instead, a national campaign that shares why we love what we do and the amazing quality of life you get when you use wine, in moderation, with meals, to create small and large communities of humans that communicate with each other. Anyone wants to help me with a storyboard for the commercial that should air during the superbowl? I have some ideas....